This is why I love Brittany Baker... And because she has a sparkly guitar strap.

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  Becca CalvertBrittany Baker

  soo one of Taylor Swift's band members just proposed to his girlfriend in a castle in Dublin, Ireland... Why am I not there now? Why am I going a month and a half late? This would be my perfect life.

  20 minutes ago ·  ·  · See Friendship

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      Brittany Baker All in good timing? He already had a girlfriend so obviously he wasn't the one for you. When you get there, there will be a single, Irish man waiting for you in a castle. THAT would be a perfect life.

      
      

      7 minutes ago · 
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      Becca Calvert But he needs to be connected to T.Swift so I can travel around with them and be her best friend...

      6 minutes ago · 
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      Brittany Baker Hmm...we'll make it work. Let's not get picky. An Irish man proposing in a castle? Come ON.

      5 minutes ago · 
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      Becca Calvert all I have to say to that is Ephesians 3:20

      5 minutes ago · 
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      Brittany Baker You.are.ridiculous.

      4 minutes ago · 
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      Alyssa Pirlo I'm just going to throw this out there, i love y'alls relationship, especially on facebook. It always brings me great joy.

      3 minutes ago · 
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      Brittany Baker haha! I'm a pretty big fan of it myself. glad it brings you joy, Alyssa!

      about a minute ago · 
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Waiting on the Lord... what a nice concept to discuss. what a comforting sentiment to encourage a friend. what a difficult mindset (and attitude of the heart) to live out.

My devotion this morning was about waiting on the Lord and trusting His timing and His plans.  Maybe I should re-read this excerpt every morning... I so struggle to not plan for God, to not make it a little easier for God to get things done.  While there's been incredible growth in my life in this area, I still have heights to scale, and oh does the Lord have His work cut out for him in my heart. Bless Him!

One thing I know for sure... I love people.  People are risky to love, but today I was so sweetly blessed with multiple encouraging, vulnerable, open, honest conversations with so many great women.  My heart feels full because of the kind words and challenges they spoke into me, but more than words or advice.  The time and presence they granted me is a gift.  I get to spend my days being intentional in relationship with God's greatest creations.  Why do I ever not love that?
Today I am reminded of an answered prayer.  The Lord has given me community and support in Orlando if I'll just reach out and take it in my hands.  I needed to be reminded of the Lord's goodness as I journey through some unknowns where I am not able to see the perfection of God's plans.  Thank you Jesus that you speak to tenderly to my heart through the words of women. 

Two things I have discovered about myself while watching videos for the Wesley fundraising dinner
1. I definitely have a Southern accent... seriously, didn't know it was that bad.
2. When I laugh, my eyes disappear.  Thanks genes for the sweet squinty eyes!

Last night I discovered an interesting fact about myself... I've been on 21 mission trips- 21 mission trips since 6th grade.  Apparently I love doing that... 

I also was reminded that since I was a little girl I've dreamed of living abroad.  I wrote a paper about it in 10th grade that I pull out and read periodically. I'm pretty sure my parents were convinced they'd need a passport to visit me at this point.  Then, I went through a phase where I couldn't imagine being that far away from friends and family, but the Lord is impressing that desire on my heart again- deeply.  My heart feels alive and somehow less restrained outside of the good ol' U.S. of A.  I love the discovery of new places and cultures and people.  I love that I'm reminded that I am not the center of the universe, and how I'm accustomed to doing life is not necessarily the right way.  I love that I live more simply- one suitcase of clothing, no cell phone, ready for the day in 20 minutes.  My heart just rested in peace this week.  I didn't feel the need to always be busy.  I didn't stress to have it all together.  I laughed (ALOT).  I played and danced and just let go.  

I had the privilege of being a "learner" this week... 

We got to help make a mess of a house into a home for a mom who needed a second chance and her 4 beautiful sons. 

We were the recipients some of the sweetest hospitality from Bahamians from the best curry chicken I've ever eaten to beach houses and cases of Goombay punch. 

I was reminded how such simple gestures can bind one heart to another like sharing my water or giving away a granola bar. 

There is no neat resolution to this post, just a smattering of thoughts- trying to make sense of the Lord's whispers and the fires He's lighting in my soul. 

We sang all hymns tonight at Wesley.  There is just something deeply beautiful about the words in some of those hymns that have been sung for years and years.  The timelessness of their message and the lasting creativity in the words and melodies allows me to feel connected to generations of struggling sinners on a journey to sanctification.  The solidarity that the history brings is so inspiring and encouraging especially when I'm feeling battle weary from trying to fight the world with all the wrong weapons.  


This verse from "On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand" met me in exactly the place I am... 

"When all around my soul gives way, He then is all my hope and stay."

Today was a twinge lighter than the last eight or nine have been, and I am so very grateful for even the minor change. 

I had counseling today, and we talked through what I want in life... good question to ask a 23 year old, right?

I'm pretty clear on where my heart is now after a really freeing and powerful discussion. It's amazing the freedom and the strength for tomorrow I am feeling just by knowing and saying out loud what I really want.  Nothing has changed (and I doubt anything will in the near future), but I know what I want.  I have a clear goal, and I'm not lying to myself anymore and invalidating my desires.  I'm not thrilled that I'm not where I want to be in life right now, but at least I can admit that. I've been trying so hard to convince myself that everything is perfect because I'm an eternal optimist who smiles when she cries. But I'm seeing the health in just being me, being authentic to who I am in the moment.  Stumbling after Jesus but also being real in my struggle to trust and understand where He's leading me...